Take off.

It was almost like a scene plucked from a movie, one with grainy overexposed doco styled shots, no steady-cams. It was in a way uncomfortable where everything appears to be where they should but at the same time the vibe suggest unwillingness, an unwillingness to leave, to be left and to be put into memory. The drive to the airport wasn’t all too long, but it felt like ages while we talked about my unwillingness to leave. “Maybe you won’t get to leave after all” she joked as traffic came to a standstill on the Bolte. It was almost as if it was cued; the bridge, the dialog and the silence as I reminisce the times when we made our way to West Footscray at night on the same highway. Traffic cleared and soon we were at the car park opposite of the terminal and I was silenced once again, in my thoughts though this time as I was constantly talking with her trying to hide my uncomfortable state; already there was nostalgia for the light in winter that I’ve always liked.

“The next time you see me, I’ll be a few more months older and wiser.”

“You mean three months?”

“Ermmm, yea, three more months I guess.” she giggled after thinking hard for a bit.

A little bit more small conversations and before I could even finish my burger, it was time to cross customs.

I placed the laptop bag I was carrying on the ground and as I turned to her, she said “give me a hug” already knowing I was going to.

As I waved goodbye, all that kept playing in my head was she telling me, “I like the ocean nowadays” as we glanced out at parked 767s.

misrage

weddings are as depressing as they are annoying.

those were the days...

2001

find me

It was almost a perfect ending, the sort with clair de lune playing at the background against the backdrop of clear skies. Flatmate left early a couple of days ago home to his better half, I’m leaving in a few hours and she, JC will leave on Monday, to be greeted in shanghai by her love. I could only conclude that each of us have a place in this world, this life; like it or not.

I’m still searching for mine.