The Unknown rants too much.

I'm pointing it out as I do realise I constantly rant. What else could I do? For years I kept bottling up and finally I suppose the bottle’s full, right to the brim. I am a deep thinker, commented those who have seen this side of me. Many times where I wish I could just turn off and not think as much. Having a good memory doesn’t help either. Long term memories are photographic, can’t say much bout the short term ones. The result; stuffs that made it into the long term category remains there, as fresh as fish out of the sea, and like fishes, they tend to stink. Above all, I remember best the better years gone by when my memory was a blessing. They haunt me now, creeping back to remind me of better times. I may look young for my age but not deep down inside. The Unknown within has grown steady old now, too tired to deal with so many issues time and again, too tired to play the many characters I've done so for years. The Unknown shouts in vain and cries in pain. It’s almost like looking out from a little window, watching my very own life passing me by, not able, not willing to do anything about it. I was out there once though, happily contented with what I have, with many great plans for the days ahead. Maybe they were too much for me to chew. Arrogant and naïve, I snorted the substance known as success, a little too much and one day, I just laid there helplessly as everything I had came tumbling down with only bits and pieces to pick from the rubble. I salvaged all I could and move on, least try to, only to realise a few years later that I’m permanently scared and it still hurts. The Unknown is not who he used to be though he tries not to show it. The Unknown still arrogantly do not believe in weakness, and yet weakness clouds The Unknown. What I do not resolve I do not forget, and what I don’t forget I regret. Depressing isn’t it?

On a lighter note of stuff, The Unknown is really busy with uni. The Unknown is trying hard to tie up some loose ends in his studies as to not let them haunt him in his later years. See, I learn from my mistakes. I am absolutely not going to let this be another A-level. I’ll sit for the A-level again during my year-off-work. It’s been at the back of my head for nearly 3 years now. Fine if my parents didn’t agree to it back then, they say it’s a waste of time. Like my parents, a buddy of mine here argues that I shouldn’t try stubbornly to change the past but instead move on. Like my parents, he couldn't see beyond time. Time is precious but contentment is timeless, anyone agrees with me on that?

Longer days are here to stay,
Winter has gone away,
Let the rain wash away the pain,
Skies are soon to change.

I’ll probably run a series of writings and reflection done over the years to substitute for my lack of input (Sorry Evie, I'll have to raincheck you the Bloody Asians). Hopefully this will give a better insight on The Unknown. Hopefully in return I'll understand the Unknown within me too.