The ironic agony
It’s ironic that the best pleasures in life are the worst for a person. It’s agonising that it’s the sin that pleases the flesh most and the flesh in turn satisfies the mind. Take alcohol for an example. I once read that if alcohol is discovered say in this century, it would probably be banned; classified as a dangerous drug, along with the likes of ecstasy and other party drugs. It’s a mind altering substance and to a certain point it could be physiologically addictive.
I stayed clear of alcohol for 2 years now. Just turn the hands of time a few full circles back and there I was, a binge drinker. I’ve stopped for 2 years, tried to adopt a better or more politically correct lifestyle and yet, no matter how hard I try, the past still have a grip on me.
Here I am had about 4 glasses of red and they really help me spill out what’s on my mind which is something which is really hard for me to do sober. Perhaps it’s the inhabitation on the conscious by the alcohol which makes it really easy for me to decipher what’s on my subconscious. To me that’s relaxing in the sense that I’ve always been bugged by what’s on my subconscious.
Subconsciously, I long for what I’ve lost. I tried, consciously to resolve my fall but nevertheless doing things correctly isn’t easy. Never was. I gave up drinking, clubbing and well; too bad I still smoke, trying to earn my way back to society. It didn’t work, maybe it did but for sure I am very disappointed with the progress of it all.
Four glasses of wine, two taken slow, two down the throat and I feel at peace. Peace I could never gain in a rational state of mine. It’s open, thoughts flow like smooth champagne. It’s easier for me to think, it’s almost like an orgasm, where thoughts are so clear, as if time just stood still. It’s there, just reach out for it. Suddenly things become so clear, so logical and so defined. It’s an agony isn’t it? That’s what I call the agony of irony.
I stayed clear of alcohol for 2 years now. Just turn the hands of time a few full circles back and there I was, a binge drinker. I’ve stopped for 2 years, tried to adopt a better or more politically correct lifestyle and yet, no matter how hard I try, the past still have a grip on me.
Here I am had about 4 glasses of red and they really help me spill out what’s on my mind which is something which is really hard for me to do sober. Perhaps it’s the inhabitation on the conscious by the alcohol which makes it really easy for me to decipher what’s on my subconscious. To me that’s relaxing in the sense that I’ve always been bugged by what’s on my subconscious.
Subconsciously, I long for what I’ve lost. I tried, consciously to resolve my fall but nevertheless doing things correctly isn’t easy. Never was. I gave up drinking, clubbing and well; too bad I still smoke, trying to earn my way back to society. It didn’t work, maybe it did but for sure I am very disappointed with the progress of it all.
Four glasses of wine, two taken slow, two down the throat and I feel at peace. Peace I could never gain in a rational state of mine. It’s open, thoughts flow like smooth champagne. It’s easier for me to think, it’s almost like an orgasm, where thoughts are so clear, as if time just stood still. It’s there, just reach out for it. Suddenly things become so clear, so logical and so defined. It’s an agony isn’t it? That’s what I call the agony of irony.
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